On Desires.
Everyone knows that one must beware of the desire for vicious things; for the desire of evil makes one evil. But I tell you further, Philothea, desire not things that are dangerous to your soul, such as balls, games and other entertainments, honours and offices, visions and ecstasies; for in all these there is much peril, vanity, and deceit. Desire not, either, things that are very far off, that is, which cannot come to pass for a long time, as many do, who thereby weary and distract their hearts to no purpose, and expose themselves to great anxieties. If a young man greatly desires to be provided with an office before the time has come, what, I pray you, does this desire avail him? If a married woman desires to be a nun, to what end? If I desire to buy my neighbour’s property before he is ready to sell it, is not my time lost in this desire? If, being sick, I desire to preach, say Holy Mass, visit other sick people, and, in short, do what those in good health do, are not these desires vain, since it is not in my power to fulfil them? And yet these useless desires take the place of others which I ought to have, such as the desires to be very patient, very resigned, very mortified, very obedient, very gentle in my sufferings: all things which God asks of me in the state wherein I am; often our desires resemble those of pregnant women, who want fresh cherries in autumn, and fresh grapes in spring.
Everyone knows that one must beware of the desire for vicious things; for the desire of evil makes one evil. But I tell you further, Philothea, desire not things that are dangerous to your soul, such as balls, games and other entertainments, honours and offices, visions and ecstasies; for in all these there is much peril, vanity, and deceit. Desire not, either, things that are very far off, that is, which cannot come to pass for a long time, as many do, who thereby weary and distract their hearts to no purpose, and expose themselves to great anxieties. If a young man greatly desires to be provided with an office before the time has come, what, I pray you, does this desire avail him? If a married woman desires to be a nun, to what end? If I desire to buy my neighbour’s property before he is ready to sell it, is not my time lost in this desire? If, being sick, I desire to preach, say Holy Mass, visit other sick people, and, in short, do what those in good health do, are not these desires vain, since it is not in my power to fulfil them? And yet these useless desires take the place of others which I ought to have, such as the desires to be very patient, very resigned, very mortified, very obedient, very gentle in my sufferings: all things which God asks of me in the state wherein I am; often our desires resemble those of pregnant women, who want fresh cherries in autumn, and fresh grapes in spring.
I do not at all approve of a person devoted to any particular vocation amusing himself with desiring another manner of life than that which belongs to him, and exercises incompatible with his present condition; for this dissipates the heart, and cools it towards the things that are necessary. If I desire the solitude of the Carthusians, I waste my time, and this desire takes the place of that which I ought to have, namely, to acquit myself well of my duties. No, I would not even have anyone desire to have a better mind or better judgment; for these desires are frivolous, and take the place of that which each person ought to have, namely, to cultivate his mind as it is; nor, finally, would I have anyone desire the means of serving God which he does not possess, instead of faithfully employing those which he has in hand. Now, all this is understood of desires that engross the heart; for as to mere wishes, they cause no harm, provided they are not frequent.
Desire not crosses, save in proportion as you shall have well borne those which have come your way; for it is an abuse to desire martyrdom and not have the strength to bear an insult. The enemy often gives us great desires for things absent, and which will never present themselves, in order to turn our minds from things present, which, small though they be, might be of great profit to us. In imagination we fight the monsters of Africa, and in truth we are killed by the little serpents that are in our path; this for want of attention.
Desire not crosses, save in proportion as you shall have well borne those which have come your way; for it is an abuse to desire martyrdom and not have the strength to bear an insult. The enemy often gives us great desires for things absent, and which will never present themselves, in order to turn our minds from things present, which, small though they be, might be of great profit to us. In imagination we fight the monsters of Africa, and in truth we are killed by the little serpents that are in our path; this for want of attention.
Desire not temptations, for that would be rashness: but exercise your heart to await them courageously, and to defend yourself against them when they come.
Variety of meats, especially when joined with quantity, always burdens the stomach, and if it be weak, it ruins it. Fill not your soul with many desires; worldly desires would utterly spoil you, and a multitude of spiritual desires would encumber you. When our soul is purged, finding itself relieved of evil humours, it has a great appetite for spiritual things; it is as it were famished, and begins to desire a thousand kinds of exercises of piety, mortification, penance, humility, charity, and prayer. It is a good sign, Philothea, to have such an appetite; but consider whether you will be able to digest all that you wish to eat. Choose therefore, according to the advice of your spiritual father, among all these desires those which can be practised and carried out forthwith, and devote yourself to them: when you have accomplished them, God will send you others, which you will likewise practise in their season: and thus you will not lose time in useless desires. I do not say that any kind of good desires should be stifled or lost; but I say that they must be brought forth in order: those which cannot presently be fulfilled must be laid away in some corner of the heart, until their time has come, and meanwhile you must give effect to those which are ripe and in season; which I say not only of spiritual desires, but also of worldly ones. Otherwise we should not know how to live except in trouble, anxiety, and haste.
Variety of meats, especially when joined with quantity, always burdens the stomach, and if it be weak, it ruins it. Fill not your soul with many desires; worldly desires would utterly spoil you, and a multitude of spiritual desires would encumber you. When our soul is purged, finding itself relieved of evil humours, it has a great appetite for spiritual things; it is as it were famished, and begins to desire a thousand kinds of exercises of piety, mortification, penance, humility, charity, and prayer. It is a good sign, Philothea, to have such an appetite; but consider whether you will be able to digest all that you wish to eat. Choose therefore, according to the advice of your spiritual father, among all these desires those which can be practised and carried out forthwith, and devote yourself to them: when you have accomplished them, God will send you others, which you will likewise practise in their season: and thus you will not lose time in useless desires. I do not say that any kind of good desires should be stifled or lost; but I say that they must be brought forth in order: those which cannot presently be fulfilled must be laid away in some corner of the heart, until their time has come, and meanwhile you must give effect to those which are ripe and in season; which I say not only of spiritual desires, but also of worldly ones. Otherwise we should not know how to live except in trouble, anxiety, and haste.